Content creator Apoorva Mukhija, popularly known as The Rebel Kid, has spoken about the online backlash that pushed her to the edge, saying the controversy over her kalawa video became her “breaking point”, reports NDTV.
In a recent storytime video on YouTube, Apoorva discussed the impact of constant criticism and how the period following the Latent controversy affected her mental health. She said she had begun feeling that her life had lost its purpose.
“After the Latent controversy, my mental health was so f****g bad that I constantly felt that I had no purpose in life,” she said. “Whatever I do, I was getting abuses and cancelled. I was getting anxiety even after waking up.”
Apoorva also compared her state of mind with the motivation she had previously seen in Tanmay Bhatt and Samay Raina. She said she had once been eager to build her career but had eventually given up.
“I was not this person earlier, and my last breaking point was the kalawa controversy,” she added.
The controversy began while Apoorva was attending Coachella. She was recording a get-ready-with-me video before going to the music festival when she cut the kalawa, a sacred thread worn around the wrist, with scissors.
In the video, she said the thread would affect the aesthetic of her outfit.
Looking back, Apoorva said she had not considered the act disrespectful towards her faith at the time. She explained that her relationship with God was relatively new and that spirituality had recently become a source of comfort for her.
“I just started believing in God, it gives me a lot of peace,” she said. “But I don’t think God believes in rules, that he cares if I cut a thread or something.”
Apoorva said she had not thought she was doing anything wrong, although people who shared the same faith were offended by the video.
“Even though I have seen bigger controversies in my life that was my breaking point truly,” she said. “Whatever I do, I say, I cannot say anything right. I was mad, and no one knew how to handle me.”
The backlash came as she was already struggling with the pressure of being judged online. Apoorva has since moved to New York to pursue an MBA and begin a new chapter in her life.
Although moving abroad had long been a dream, she admitted that leaving India had also been frightening. Her friends, career and familiar surroundings remain in India, while she is now preparing to return to student life in a dormitory.
Apoorva made her acting debut with Nadaaniyan. She also appeared in the first season of The Traitors and was recently seen in Lock Upp Season 2, where she entered the show as an informant.
